Talking to myself

It's hard. I thought I was totally normal with everything. I thought I'd be content with graduating..but now. It feels like I might be sad. But maybe it's because every time you finish something and start something else, you feel a sense of sadness. Not because you're leaving much, but maybe because you know that what's to come may be worse than what you've already gone through. It's more of a feeling that maybe you're not done in this category. You make friends and you think that they won't really last. But what if it's just started to last? What if you've just started to feel that there's more to it. There's more to this category. And the feeling of wonder and regret lingers in your head. But you can't do anything. And then the realization that nothing last's forever, is a real thing because nothing really does last forever. Everything is a stage.Except death. Unless you believe in the afterlife. But if you don't, then death is the last stage. When you die maybe you go into this eternal calming sleep state that you totally deserve because you are a good person. Or maybe it is another stage. Maybe not a stage that leads to the afterlife or reincarnation but it's a stage leading to something greater. What if it's all a lie? What if your being is someones sick and twisted way of entertainment?

I think too much. I think way too much. I need to breathe. Like seriously need to just chill the hell out. I want to be a star. I want to be recognized for my talents and want to be a superstar. But....it's not possible. I should get rid of these thoughts. I should. These things will hold me back from what I am supposed to be doing. I'm not supposed to be a singer. If i was, I wouldn't have turned out so shy and weird-like. I'm not supposed to be a dancer. If I was, I would have been more flexible. I'm supposed to be a doctor. I mean it's written everywhere isn't it. And even then, it is a good profession. I will be doing good. And I like doing good. So I would be doing something that I like...right? But what do I do? I go along with it. I've been going along with everything so far, so why stop now.

Farewell Humans.